Families are our first introductions to the world and the foundation of our lives. However, we know it's not always smooth sailing...
Christian Living
Leadership
Relationships
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Hello, welcome to SoFull Sessions. I'm Eli DeHora, counselor specializing in relational, spiritual, and emotional health, giving insights on family dynamics, personal growth, and leadership skills. And today on Family Fridays, we are exploring the intricate bands of family relationships. Families as they say are like branches on a tree. We all grow in different directions, yet our roots remain as one, or at least start out from a beginning source. Family is our first introduction to the world. It's where we learn our first words, take our first steps, and understand the basic of human relationships. But as many of us know, it's not always smooth sailing. Every family has its unique rhythm, a mix of personalities, belief, and histories. And while this mix can create beautiful memory, it can also lead to challenges, misunderstandings, generational gaps, and differing viewpoints that can create friction. Let's take, for example, the classic teenage rebellion phase. Remember when you wanted to stay out late and your parents just didn't get why? Or parents, remember when you were worried sick waiting for your teen to come home? It's a dance of independence and concern and sometimes a really deep discussion of why they came home late. But here's an interesting fact. Studies show that such phases are not just about rebellion. They're about identity formation, about finding one's place in the world. While it can be challenging, it's actually a crucial step in growing up. On the flip side, parents, remember the challenges of balancing work, home, and kids? Trust me. I know. Definitely going through that right now with my one-year-old boy and my seven-year-old boy, first grader, at school right now. The late night diaper changes, the school meetings, the endless chores, parenting is truly a labor of love filled with joys and challenges and sometimes, let's be real, a lot of times, tears. Then there's the dynamic of extended family. The joyous family reunions or not, the holiday gathering, and the also occasional disagreements. With every family member, it plays a unique role in everybody's life. And understanding these roles can help us navigate the complexities. For instance, grandparents often play the role of the family's memory keepers, sharing tales of the past and pictures and recipes and music and culture, while the younger generation brings in a fresh perspective, new tradition, pushing the new era to come. And it's a beautiful blend of the old and new. But like any relationship, family dynamics require effort. Communication, understanding, and patience are the key. It's about listening, not just hearing, not just thinking of a response to say while the other person's talking. It's about seeing things from the other person's perspective. We'll dive deeper into these dynamics and share a story and explore ways to strengthen family bonds. Because at the end of the day, family's not just about being related by blood. We all know that. People say that blood is thicker than water. Well, sometimes that may not be the case. Family is about love, care, and the memories we share, and all of it is intentional. One common challenge many families face today is the struggle of balancing quality time together and with the demands of modern life. We got to go to work, there's school happening, extracurricular activities, and families often find themselves like ships passing in the night. Consider the fictional scenario of the family, the Martins. Both parents work full-time jobs, their eldest daughter is deep into soccer practice multiple times a week, and their son is, of course, involved in his world of online gaming. They realize they barely sat together for a meal or had meaningful conversations. What can the families like Martins do? Well, first, scheduling regular family time, even if it's just a weekly dinner. That doesn't even have to be a dinner going out or it doesn't have to be a dinner staying at home. It could be a different types of scenarios. These scheduled times can make a world of a difference, even if at first it's a rough takeoff. Second, creating tech-free zones and times that can encourage face-to-face interactions. And third, engaging in group activities like board games or weekend outings can foster bonding. I wanted to talk about real quick about family DNA, and I'm not just talking about genealogy or blood type or anything like that, but rather the rhythms of the families in and out. Parents, the more you guys are leading in the front of how the rhythms of family is to be, the easier it is for you to actually have your children, your family around you follow the rhythms of the daily life. But you got to first sit down and figure out what is my family's DNA? What is it that we like to do, not just as individuals, but as a family? Some families like to go outside. Some families like to play board games. Some families like to watch movies. Some families like to cook together. Some families like to watch documentaries. Other families like to watch mysteries. The more that you are intentional in figuring out what is it that we all like to do, the easier it is to apply these type of skills about scheduling time, creating times to encourage face-to-face interactions, and group activities. So before you even start planning and looking at the calendar, figure out your family's rhythm. And sometimes, like I said, it will be a rough takeoff. But as soon as you get past the clouds, it'll be easy flying. Now let's back this up with some facts. Studies have shown that families who engage in regular, meaningful interaction with great intentionality have stronger emotional bonds. Children in these families often exhibit higher self-esteem and better performance in school. Moreover, the consistent family time can actually act as a stress reliever. You're probably, parents are probably thinking, hold on, a lot of times, family time is not a stress reliever. In fact, it's probably more stress-inducing. True, granted. But it's actually a stress reliever more for the children. Their guards are down. They're trusting you in the situation. And they actually discuss your concerns with you, and they tend to experience lower levels of stress. And by you actually listening to your child, you're creating more of a bond, creating more of a trust. And in the long run, it's creating a family dynamic and bonding experience. And it's a beautiful, beautiful thing once it gets down pat in the form of a rhythm. The takeaway? While modern life can be hectic, making deliberate efforts to spend quality time together can actually fortify family dynamics and bonds of relationship and communication overall, creating better mental health well-being for all members of the family. As we wrap up today's session, I want to encourage you to reflect on your family's DNA, like I talked about earlier. Your rhythm. Maybe try implementing one of those solutions we discussed. And remember, it's the small moments that often leave the most significant imprint on our hearts. So if all this information sounds overwhelming, I want you to start small. I want you to start with just a one-on-one, with a great question, open starter, just saying, hey, you know, I really enjoy the time that we spent together the other day. Can we spend some time again? And again, and again. And slowly but surely, you'll see that the family dynamics is going to be fortified. Thank you for joining me on Soulful Sessions on today's Family Fridays. Stay connected, cherish your loved ones, and stay soulful. Bye. Bye. Bye.
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